Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
