Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
