I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
