taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Randomize
