that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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