Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Randomize
