I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Best friends brother. Beat that.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize
