How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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