You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Randomize
