Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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