just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
