so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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