It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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