If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
