when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
