Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
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