I looked at my own cervix.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
You're like the curious george of whores
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
