The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Randomize
