she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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