I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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