Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
the liver wants what the liver wants
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
