is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
