in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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