Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
