So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
