I don't think brook has ever known best
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
