This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
