BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
