just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
