Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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