ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
i permit you to call me
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
