You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
