is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
There r osticjed everywhere
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
