I'm drive I can fine osifer
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
