Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
