My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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