Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
