hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
