so that wasnt chicken after all
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Randomize
