I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
foreskin is a definite game changer
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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