whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
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