So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize