We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
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