not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
