in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
