well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
We are all done wearing pants today
Randomize
