Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
