I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Randomize
