Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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