Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Do vagina's smell?
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
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